My Heart, Your Home: The Bump ~ 15 Weeks   

Sunday, 23 September 2012

The Bump ~ 15 Weeks

I am finding it hard to sit here and focus, I found it hard to actually do my hair and put on a dress and leave the house, I found it hard to find a smile and I found it hard to play with Evelyn. This week has been that kind of week and today has been the hardest day yet. For nine days now I have had a relentless and consistent head splitting migraine. I do not exaggerate when I say that I have not had even an hour of relief. These past two days it has been so bad that I cant actually speak properly. I try and words don't come, just noise. When I stand I experience the most intense stabbing pain in my left eye that I lose sight for moments, I go black, I feel dizzy, I am lucky if I don't fall over. Throughout my pregnancy with Evelyn I was consistently sick, at this point in time, I would prefer that. At least then I would throw up and then feel ok for a few hours.

Pregnancy is so hard on our bodies. So hard. My first pregnancy I had every symptom you wish you'd never get. But by the time Evelyn was born I had already forgotten. Thats the beauty of pregnancy. It doesn't last forever and each day that I wake from a very painful and restless sleep with my head still screaming at me, I remind myself, this wont be forever and this will be worth it. Because in 6 months time, I will be holding Jelly and I won't remember a thing. This is what is getting me through another day.

We had our booking in appointment at our hospital of choice on Monday. Lindy, our midwife, was wonderfully kind and gentle and the type of person you want to surround yourself with. The hospital is newly renovated and has only had 21 babies born there since reopening. It is also within walking distance from our home. The view from the room is our favourite beach or a golf course. It is peaceful and beautiful.

Anthony and I have discussed how we would like our birth to go this time around. Before I was ever pregnant I had always wanted to have a water birth. Throughout my pregnancy with Evelyn, I was somehow talked out of this. When I went into labour with Evelyn I didn't have with me a birth plan. I am the type of person who, once I have a plan, everything must go to plan. And so I didn't want to set myself up for more stress or any disappointment. However, this time, we have decided to have a plan. I will fight my hardest to have my water birth. And I will try again to have a drug free birth. With Evelyn I made it to 29 hours before needing an epidural. This time, I will try to make it to the 30th hour. I won't be disappointed if I have to rely on those drugs, but I will be disappointed if I don't at least try. 

Jelly, you have made this week a very hard week for your Mama to focus on anything other than her throbbing head. But even throughout that I have found my hands drifting down and holding you whilst day dreaming about the day I get to touch you and see your face. 

Its you and me babe, through the pain and through the glory, we will make it to the end!

Things to do and see in Fisherman's Beach
Tim Bailey - The weatherman, is more often than not, recording the weather on this beach!


  1. You are looking so good. loving your baby bellie, and Beautiful photo's xx

    1. Thank you beautiful girl! Full credit goes to Anthony for the photos, he is doing an amazing job!

  2. Oh Evelyn you gorgeous thing! Olive & Evelyn must be similar in age? Olive was born 14.4.11.
    It's funny I was just reminiscing about Olive's birth today, even though I am not pregnant I am really regretting not having a birth photographer there with us. I really hope you get the birth that you so desire, there is a sense of calm when it all falls into place.
    I look forward to watching that belly grow (please do not make me too clucky)

    1. Very similar in age! Evie was born 03.04.11 :)

      Oh I would love to have a birth photographer too, I barely have any photos from Evies birth and the ones I do have are blurry because our camera decided to die at that very moment! But Im not sure that I could relax with a stranger in the room?

      Ill try not to get you clucking xx

  3. You're looking great Jess. I'm hoping so strongly for you that your terrible, pounding head subsides so very soon! But as you said, it will all be a distant memory when Jelly arrives!

    1. Thank you sweet girl, how are you feeling?
      What is your due date?

      Oh my, I really hope this headache fades away but it is now just becoming the new norm.
      I saw my chiropractor this morning and she has helped dull it a little
      Will see an acupuncturist tomorrow. Fingers crossed!


    2. I'm due the 15th of March. I'm feeling really good this week. Good idea going to the Chiro, I went back to my Osteo two weeks ago and I can already see an improvement in my migraines

    3. Oh we are 3 days apart! There are so many people in my life due around the same time, its great having people to talk to who are going through the same thing at the same time!

      What does the Osteo do? Ive never been to one, but at this stage Im willing to go anywhere!

    4. Oh really! It's nice to be able to share the journey with other people!

      Osteo is great, they do a combination of massage and cracking. I used to go to the Chiro but found Osteo can realease my neck a bit more. Anything is worth a shot when you have migraines!!

  4. Beautiful photos...and I love your dress!

    I did Hypnobirthing when I had Toddler C. I didn't do a water birth...mostly because I laboured primarily on the ward and not in the birthing suites...but I did have a drug free birth.
    It was amazing and I would highly recommend it.
    I am happy to answer any questions about Hypnobirthing!

    Hope you are feeling better!

    1. Thank you! Anthony is doing such a great job at taking the photos :)
      Would you believe that dress actually came from French Connection.

      Oh that is so great to have someone to to quiz about it all!
      Ill be sure to pick your brain xx